Clergyman's

“Your honour,”

— At this point that I am free to clear my heart and my mind,I would like to say to you, your honour and everyone:Every minute of my existence, I bitterly regret what I did, the lives that I destroyed, the grief and the immense pain that I inflicted on so many people, including the members of my own family.I am ashamed, ashamed of what I did. I do not know why I committed such a senseless act.And to this day, I have a hard time believing it.In spite of what has been said about me, I am not a terrorist, nor an Islamophobe, rather a person who was carried away by fear, negative thoughts and a horrible form of despair.For a long time, I had suicidal thoughts and an obsession with death.As if I was fighting with a demon who ended up getting the best of me, who ended up winning against me.I very much wish I could go back in time and change things.Sometimes, I feel that all of this is a bad dream, a long nightmare.I would like to ask you for forgiveness for all the harm that I have done to you, but I know that what I did is unforgivable.If by pleading guilty, I can do a bit of good in all of this, then it will at least be something.This is why I am pleading guilty before you.- Alexandre Bissonnette